Work...

The next two days were a blur. I decided I would let myself do whatever my little heart desired. If that meant sleeping all day, alright. If it meant eat until I explode, great. If it meant shopping until I plowed all the way through next month’s rent, awesome. I did none of those things though. I think because I had given myself unabashed permission to do so, the idea was no longer appealing.
I slept until I woke up, I ate when hungry, and shopped a little for Christmas. I visited Lincoln Park like I always did when I came to Chicago for interviews, walking along West Armitage, looking at all the cute shops and stopping outside Art and Science on Halstead. This was the location I dropped my resume off at earlier this year and the location I was at when I accepted the job.
I turned and headed back towards the train, stopping into a chocolate shop for hot chocolate and a moment to write for a while. Once I couldn’t sit still anymore, I headed out again, this time for the Loop.
I was immediately swept up and sucked into the undertow of the city’s energy. It moved me across streets, pushed me into thick crowds of people bustling down the sidewalks and occasionally dropping me off into a store or two to catch my breath.
Borders book store downtown is one of my favorites. It’s got several floors and the café’s windows expose magnificent views of the city. I wanted to stop for coffee here but it was packed.
I took the train everywhere and loved it, wondering if it would ever get old. I loved watching the people, the views, and loved the fact that there was no traffic to sit through and I could read if I wanted to.
I knew Kaci would be home around seven and so I made sure I was there at that time both days of freedom before the seriousness of employment settled in. I realized that before seeing Kaci walk through the door, I’ve barely uttered a sentence all day.
“What have you been up to?” she asks while putting her things down in her room.
“Aimless wandering. All day. It’s been amazing!” I reply.
“You’ve been outside walking around in all this?”
I nod. It was clear today.
“It’s so cold!”
“I know!” I laugh.
We exchanged crazy travel stories, family history stories, and work stories. I told her about Kat and me coming to Chicago for my birthday last year, about meeting my friend Paul in December and the insanity of that first trip back to Chicago after my birthday. I told her about Rob and about Pete. It’s like I’ve known her forever, and I can tell her anything.
“Your life is insane!” she exclaims, perching on the counter, swinging her legs.
I smile and shake my head. Sometimes I feel I live the most boring life and other times, not so much.
“Just you wait. Once the weather gets really bad, it’ll be me and you, firing up the fire place, and making s’mores and doing crafts.” she laughs.
I can’t wait really. To talk with someone while snow is falling and making the sparklies sounds wonderful.
“Are you ready for tomorrow?” she asks.
“Yup!” I smile. “I have my clothes and everything all ready just like the first day of first grade!” I laugh. I swear, some things never change.
“Good! I like to leave a little after seven. It’s the last possible minute to leave without being late. You’re going to get there early. I’ll have another 45 minutes on the train.”
“Are you serious?”
“Oh yeah. I just take a little nap or do my make-up.”
For whatever reason, I’m not worried about a thing. It’s as if time doesn’t exist and if it does, it’s on my own terms. Even waiting for the trains today, I know I don’t have any control over them and they’ll get there when they get there. I feel perfectly relaxed as I crawl into bed, excited about this new thing I’ve started…
My alarm goes off at 6:00am. I eat breakfast and stay on the computer a little longer than I should have. I quickly hop in the shower and get dressed. I’m about to apply my make-up with I hear someone knocking on my door.
“Melissa?” Kaci whispers.
“Yeah?” I step out of the bathroom and open the door. She’s still in her pajamas.
“Can you be ready in twenty?”
Uh oh.
“Yup!”
“Kay.” she nods and walks down the hall. I get back to my face, racing through make-up application and drying my hair curly instead of wearing it straight like I had planned. I pushed my feet into a new pair of shiny high heeled boots, grabbed my purse, and walked to the kitchen.
“Ready?” Kaci asked, closing her bedroom door.
I nodded.
“Are you going to be able to walk in those?” she eyed my boots.
“Oh yeah.”
“We have a ways to go.”
“It’ll be fine.” I smile, thinking I’ve been wearing heels since the seventh grade.
I was practically crying by the time we got to the train platform. What have I done to my feet? I’m not even at work yet, plus how am I going to get back? Worry about it later I guess.
Kaci sits in the same car every morning. She likes the sweet man who takes the tickets.
“So you’ve got a friend with you this morning.” he smiles at her, and nods at me.
“Yup! She just moved here. I feel like a proud mama on my baby’s first day of school!”
We laugh, I buy my ticket and sit back, staring at the window. We’re on a double decker commuter train that heads directly north of the city. Our stop is one stop from downtown and fifteen minutes from Evanston.
“The next stop is yours.” Kaci smile at me.
“Ok. When I get off, which direction do I go?”
“Hmm. Take a right off the train, go down the stairs and take another right. I think that’s the street the salon is on.”
“Kay.” I smile.
The train stops and I stand up, pulling my coat back on.
“Fly away little bird! Have a great day!” Kaci exclaims.
“You too! I laugh.
I follow her instructions and find the salon. I’m thirty minutes early and don’t see a Starbucks. I stop into Panera and have a mocha, constantly glancing at my phone, waiting for the minutes to tick by. Finally I decide to go.
I stop outside the door and notice a cute girl leaning against the wall, smoking a cigarette.
“Do you work here?” she asks.
“I do now.” I laugh. “You?”
She takes a long drag off the cigarette and nods. “Yeah, it’s my first day.”
“Me too!” I examine her a little closer. Cyndi told me I’d be starting with another girl. She’s about five feet tall with a jet black bob and bangs. Her eyes are blue and her nails are green. She’s wearing black pants and a navy blue down coat that is tied around her tiny waist. “I’m Melissa.” I offer my hand.”
“Lauren.” she smiles and shakes it. She tells me she’s from Chicago, and just graduated from school.
“I’m so nervous man!” she stomps on her cigarette. “Are you?”
“Kinda.” I smile, looking at her, thinking this was me eight years ago, starting at Van Michael. Nervous. Everything is different now. Yes I’m nervous because I don’t know anything about this company really, but at the same time, I’m not because, I’ve already done this before.
“When was your interview?” she asks.
“April.” I reply.
“Oh wow! Why are you starting now?”
“Um. Life got crazy for a minute.” I didn’t want to talk about it today.
“I understand.” I she nods.
“Are you waiting to get in?” a voice behind me startles both of us.
I turn to see a black woman with keys, unlocking the door. We nod.
“C’mon. You could’ve knocked. Someone’s there.”
Lauren and I looked at each other then walked inside.
“Have a seat. I’ll tell Cyndi you’re here.” the woman tells us.
We do as we’re told and within minutes Cyndi emerges from the back of the salon.
“Hey ladies!” she exclaims, shaking our hands. “Come on back!”
We follow her to the back of the salon where we later learn is the blow dry room. There are two 3 ring binders sitting at the stations we’re standing next to.
“Can I get you any coffee?” she asks.
“Sure.” Lauren and I say in unison.
“Ok. Let me show you where to put your coats.”
We follow her further back down a narrow hallway and stop when she shows us the rack of coats that we can add ours to.
“I’ll meet you back out with your coffee.” she smiles and disappears.
Lauren and I giggle and head back to the blow dry stations. Cyndi appears again with two cups of coffee.
“Ok, I need you guys to fill out,” Cyndi opens Lauren’s notebook and pulls out several sheets of paper. “these forms and hand them into me and we’ll go from there.”
We nod and get to it. It’s the usual employment tax forms and an acknowledgement that we’ve received the employee handbook plus a questionnaire asking about various likes and dislikes.
We finish at the same time, give the papers to Cyndi and wait for more instructions.
The day goes by quickly. It was eight hours of going over the handbook, asking questions, training, meeting the stylists and other assistants, and shampooing clients. My head was in a fog when it was all said and done. There is so much to remember. Everything has it’s place, things are to be done in a specific way, and everyone has their own idiosyncrasies that we have to learn. The process starts over again when we’re rotated to Lincoln Park, and moved again to Wicker Park. We’ll be rotating between all three salons for the remainder of our time as assistants before being placed at one location as stylists. We’ll be attending class every Monday from eleven to eight, and are expected to have models for our first class on December first. Whew!
We leave at five and I head to the train station. My feet are screaming. I noticed that all the employees wear flats. I don’t own any and am still splashing through the waters of denial that I can handle heels at work. Maybe not these damn boots but other heels, the ones I wore all the time at Salonred should be fine. Right?
I have to wait forty five minutes for the train. I can’t stand any longer. I perch my ass on the cement edge of this thing sticking out from a beam that’s helping to hold a roof over the platform.
The train comes, and drops me off at my stop. I exit the platform then stop. Which way do I go? Straight? No. Left? Maybe. I think so. Yeah. I start walking. Nothing looks familiar and it’s dark. Maybe I’m going the wrong way. I go back the other way. No this isn’t right either. Damn! I look around. There are three bus stops. One will take me home, one will take me away from home and one will take me to Lincoln Park. I don’t care anymore. I get on the one that’ll take me to Lincoln Park, knowing at least I can take the train from there. I just need to sit.
I get off the bus when I see the train station and take the brown line to the blue line. The brown line is my favorite, even though it’s slow as hell. I think it has the best views of downtown.
Kaci is home when I get there.
“Hey! How was work?” she exclaims.
“Good! There is so much to remember! It took me forever to get home!”
“How come?”
“I had to wait for the Metra then I got lost, and took the Armitage bus to the brown line and went from there.”
“Whoa! Why didn’t you take the Ashland bus?”
“I didn’t know which one to get on.”
“It’s the one on the corner right when you get off the train.” she smiles.
“I’ll remember that.”
“We taking the train tomorrow?” she asks.
“Oh yeah!” I smile and headed to my room.
I’m all freaked out. I don’t know how to explain it, but there is so much in my head at the moment that I can’t seem to focus on one thing. I eat half a box of cereal, knowing it won’t solve anything but at that exact moment the feeling of the crunchy substance beneath my teeth lulls me into a satiated numbness and I fall into bed.

Now what...?

I’m up early and milling around my room, trying to figure out how I’m going to unpack all these boxes and where am I going to put everything. Kat is still asleep and everything is very quiet. We agreed we’d be up at eight to get ready for brunch.
Once showered and ready to go we look at the map of Wicker Park.
“Oh my gosh, this is illegal.” I giggle. “We can walk there! I’m going to be four hundred pounds!”
“This is trouble.” Kat laughs.
I found the Bongo Room over a year ago when Kat and I came to Chicago and I was on the lookout for chocolate chip pancakes. Although they didn’t have any, everything else looked so delectable that I insisted we go and each time I went back to Chicago after that, I stopped in.
We get bundled up and head out. There is no wait and we realize that we made it just in time as a swarm of people came through the door.
After ordering we sit back and sigh.
“I still feel like this is vacation.” I smile.
“It’s not going to feel like it once I get on that plane!” Kat laughed.
“I know…” I trail off.
“Don’t you start. There will be no crying.” she warns.
“I’m not.” I assure her, remembering Pete saying the same thing. I reach into my messenger bag and pull out a blue Tiffany’s bag. “Got something for ya.” I push towards her.
“Ooo…” she smiled and pulled out a box that matched the bag. When she pulled out the necklace, I exclaimed, “It’s the bean! It reminded me of our first trip when we ran over to the park to see the bean sculpture before rushing to the airport!”
“Yay!” she exclaims, examining it. “ Not gonna cry, not gonna cry… she blinks while clasping the necklace around her neck. I’m chewing on my face to keep from losing it. She pulls out the card containing a letter I wrote her explaining how much she means to me.
“Don’t read that now.” I swallow.
“Ok.” she smiles. “Thank you.”
“Thank you. I couldn’t do this without you.”
“Sure you could have.”
“Hell no. Who was gonna drive?”
We both laugh and chatter on about various things.
“Promise me you’ll go to a bar one night and simply watch a Bears game, just to be around people. I know football isn’t your thing, but just go.”
I nod. “I can watch a game for a little bit. ’Bout third quarter though, I’m bored.”
I never really understood the game anyway. I start asking questions and before I know it, Kat has various table items like sugar packets and little vials on cream spread out on the table, explaining the game.
The food arrives and we’re quiet for a little bit. Again, the weird feeling I had with Pete and wanting things to just speed up so I could get over the uncomfortable feelings of missing him have returned and are continuing with Kat.
“I think I’m going to take a cab back.” she announces.
“Ok.” The train is down this weekend.
“So I need to get my things and probably get a cab at Division and Milwaukee.”
I nod. “Kay.” We pay the bill and head back.
“You want to take that road instead?” she asks as we approach a street we passed on the way to brunch.
“Sure.” I nod.
“Are you going to be able to find your way back over there?” she asks.
“Eventually!” I laugh. “The pancakes will lead me!”
Half way down the street words painted on a fence catches my eye. They read “I love you so much!”
“Hang on Kat.” I call out to her, digging in my bag for my camera. I snap a picture of the fence wondering if it’s Rob’s way of saying hello. We resume out trek home.
“Hey you guys!” Kaci’s voice calls to us from the kitchen as we walk in.
“Mornin’!”
“What have ya’ll been up to?” she asks.
“The Bongo Room!” I chirp. “Kat’s got to head to the airport now.”
“Yeah…” Kat trails off.
“Ok, well if you want, I’m going to the grocery store a little later. You can come with me and I can show you around after that.” Kaci looks at me.
“Sounds good!” My head is swimming again. This is real! I live here and there really isn’t any going back…
Kat gets her things and we head down Division, crossing the street, neither of us saying anything, and my mind void of any emotion.
“Alright!” she says as we approach a cab. “Have fun!” she hugs me hard.
“Will do!” I exclaim as if I’ll see her sometime that evening, as if she’s not going to get on a plane, as if I’m still on vacation…
She closes the cab door and I turn to walk across the street again. My hands fumble in my bag for my phone. Whatever feelings that might hit, I don’t want them. I dial Pete’s number.
“Hey darlin’! his warm, deep voice answers. I want to keep his voice in my ear always to recall when I need some sort of calming down.
“Hi!” I squeak.
“How’s it going?”
“Um. Good. Uh, Kat just got in a cab to go to the airport…”
“Oh…how you feeling?”
“Don’t know yet.”
He tells me stories of his past couple of days, getting together with some friends from law school and I tell him all about our drive up here until I look up and realize that I don’t know where I am. I must have crossed the at the wrong street. Dammit. I walk back in the other direction and find the street I need to be on, eventually making it home. Pete and I stay on the phone a little longer then it’s time for me to head to the store with Kaci.
“I think I left my list at home.” she tells me as we’re half way there.
“Uh oh.” I glance at her. I didn’t actually need anything, just didn’t want to be alone just yet.
“Don’t let me forget coffee filters.”
I nod. We weren’t at the store long before heading out again.
“Ok, so I’ll show you what’s all around here. You can walk to Art and Science from here and when the weather gets really bad you can either take the blue line on the train, or the Division bus.”
I nod, having a feeling I’ll be doing lots of nodding and lots of trying to understand everything.
“The buses will become your best friend.” she says.
“I don’t, or well, I haven’t done buses. They freak me out. I can never tell which direction they’re going in.”
“It’s tricky at first but I promise, eventually, it’ll click. Ok, so this is Bucktown. This is where all the fancy shopping is. Lots of good restaurants as well. There’s a coffee shop.” she pointed to our left. “They have great coffee.”
I glance inside as we walk by. It’s attached to this little bakery with fancy cakes displayed in the window.
“Starbucks is right there.” she pointed across the street.
“Good to know.” I smile. “I’m in need of some fabulous coffee shops. Atlanta has a lot of independent ones but I haven’t noticed too many in Chicago.”
“Well. There are like, six right here.”
“Perfect!”
We stop in a couple of stores and continue on our way, telling stories, laughing, leaves crunching under our feet, bright blue sky hovering above us. I couldn’t be happier.
“I start work in Evanston on Wednesday. How should I get there?” I ask as walk back into our place.
“What time do you have to be there?”
“Eight thirty.”
“Oh! You can take the Metra with me. It’s the commuter train.”
Could this be anymore perfect?
“Are you serious?!” I laugh.
“Yeah, it’ll drop you off right at the salon.”
“This is fabulous!” I exclaim.
“I know!”
Later I retreat back to my room, talking to mom on the phone, unpacking, stumbling over boxes, texting Kat, stopping to eat, and unpacking some more.
“You’ve made a lot of progress!” Kaci exclaims standing in my doorway.
“Yay” I clap. “Trying to…”
“It looks good.” she smiles and walks away.
It isn’t long before I’m done. Actually finished with the whole project and I fall happily into bed.