Giddy...

Happy Monday! It feels good to say that once again. This is my first Monday free from class. For now, there are no more model searches, no more scrambling to find more when folks cancel, and no more stressing over testing out of haircuts.
I’ve spent the past few days running, writing, and seeing a few friends. My first full week of work as a stylist starts tomorrow. I seriously can’t believe it’s here already. I’m elated in so many different ways. I’ve been so content this past week and am so looking forward to starting the next part of my career.
This morning I’m up early and downtown at Intelligentsia coffee before the sun is up. I’ve adopted a new routine of coming here when they open at 6am then going to the gym next door. I’ve also recently developed a crush on a boy working behind the counter which has made my time spent here even more entertaining. I’ve only seen him a handful of times since coming but each time have been met with smiles and a little jump in my chest that I haven’t felt in a while.
When I push through the revolving door I see him standing with a girl at the register and feel my skin warm. I’ve wanted to talk to him but haven’t thought of anything clever to say. I notice that he’s gotten a haircut as I approach the counter and giggle to myself that that’s what I’m going to use to chat with him.
“Hi!” I smile at both of them and order a large Americano. “I like your haircut.” I tell the object of my affection while the girl rings me up.
“Thank you.” he smiles.
“Where’d you get it done?”
“A barber shop near Fullerton. It was my first experience in one.” He tells me about his time spent there explaining that he usually gets his haircut every five months or so. The first time I saw him his straight black hair was covering his ears. It’s now quite short and I wonder why he lets it go so long. I’m intrigued by his thoughts on his experience. I like men’s hairdressing and am always curious as to what it is they think and want in their service.
He’s quite talkative and I like it. I tell him I do hair and am always investigating people. Our conversation moves to where we’re from, how we got here and where we live now.
“Atlanta.” I smile. “You?”
“Alaska.”
(What?!)
“I came here for vacation and decided to move…”
“I moved here with my girlfriend at the time…”
“Wicker Park…”
“Logan Square…”
He gets busy so I sit and write with my Americano, occasionally looking up to meet his eyes, smiling and watching him look away first, making me smile more. I seriously have such a fourth grade crush on this guy. He seems to have a very gentle spirit about him and I want to know more.
I order another Americano an hour or so later. He makes it and asks what I’m writing.
“Right now? That’s my journal. I’m using it as a distraction from the novel project I have going on.” I blurt.
“A novel? What’s it about? Or do you not want to say or talk about it?”
Hair, grief, love, and yes I need to talk about it to remain accountable…is what I want to say but reign all that in. Something tells me though that I can share with him whatever I want. I just don’t want to do it yet.
“Oh no, I need to talk about it!” I laugh and tell him it’s about my experience doing hair in Atlanta. The subject of Rob is still lingering in my mind but I refuse to let it out.
“I’ve never met anyone who has written a novel.” Delicious boy tells me.
“Neither have I.” I laugh. “It’s quite the task.”
He smiles and holds out his hand over the espresso machine. “I’m Jeff.”
“Melissa.” I grin and place my hand in his feeling his fingers wrap around it and firmly deliver in my opinion, a perfect handshake.
“Good to meet you.”
“You as well.” I’m feeling all sorts of things spark in my brain.
He gets busy again and I get back to writing. Even though my heart may explode from all my caffeinated nervousness I’m slow with my writing and enjoying the process. After a while though I can’t sit still any longer. I scan the counter and don’t see Jeff behind it. I don’t want to leave without saying goodbye. I wait another minute or so and start thinking about leaving one of my cards with the girl at the register for him. As the thought leaves my mind though, he’s there. Standing next to me, out of no where and I nearly jump out of my skin.
“Hey, I’m about to go on break and was wondering if you’d like to join me?”
EEEEEKKKKKK!!!!
“I would!” I shut my journal and put my pen down faster than lightening.
“Ok. I have only thirty minutes and need to get my things together. Are you vegetarian or vegan?”
“I move in that direction.” I nod.
“Ok, I was thinking about this little diner around the corner…”
“Perfect.” I smile.
He disappears and I pack my things up. Minutes later we’re outside inhaling the freezing February air.
“Have you eaten at many places downtown?” he asks.
“I haven’t. I don’t know a whole lot about this area.”
“I just know this block. There are a lot of great places tucked away though.”
The diner is in a huge building on the ground floor. The ceiling in the building reminds me of a fancy cake with all it‘s pink and green intricacies. We sit across from each other, both of us grinning. After ordering we bounce questions back and forth off of each other. I’m completely, totally, and utterly enjoying his calm, laid back nature. I feel I could possibly open up to him, maybe let him in…but later. A shift in my behavior has taken place since Charlie when it comes to dating. I’m starting to pay attention more to what I want instead of anticipating what they want and just going along with it. I still have a long road ahead of me concerning this project but am happy to be questioning my actions instead of blindly going forward.
Thirty minutes went by like thirty seconds. He’s off work at one and I’m…well I’m off all day and want to see more of him.
“May I ask for your number?” he asks.
“Of course.” I smile and tell it to him as he programs it into his phone.
“You want mine?” he asks.
“Sure. You can text it or call.”
“I’ll text it. Thank you for coming.” he smiles.
“Thank you for asking.” I return his smile and confess that I was going to leave my card with one of his co-workers. I tell him I have to run some errands but am free later if he wants to hang out.
“A nap is definitely in store for me, but after that, I’ll give you a call.”
“Deal.”
He thanks me again for coming along and goes back to work as I bounce to the gym.
After the gym, I head to the grocery store, home, then go for a run. It’s tough. I’m tired and feel my feet wanting to drag. The ground is clear and free of snow and ice so I feel guilty for not taking advantage of going.
Back at home, I quickly shower and spend some time writing. At a little after five Jeff texts me asking if I still want to hang out. I am stupid giddy and loving every second of it. I’m giggling as I text him back saying yes I do.
He calls a few minutes later. We decide on Café de Luca on Damen at 6:30. I really wanted to finish my writing and look presentable being he’s only seen me in my gym clothes.
At six, I’m hauling ass up there. I decided to walk instead of taking the bus. I suddenly feel a rush of negative feelings wash over me. I feel guilty that I’m keeping him out late, knowing he has to open again in the morning. I also feel badly for wanting to finish my writing before meeting up and voicing that. I quickly push it all away remembering that if this wasn’t what he was able to do he would tell me. As I turn on to Damen I see a guy pretty far ahead of me and by watching him I’m pretty sure it’s Jeff. Funny how someone’s movements can identify them.
It is Jeff and he’s turned around, smiling at me as I approach him.
“Hi!” I squeal walking into his open arms, wrapping mine around him.
“How’s it going?” he asks.
“Good. You?”
He nods. “Good. Looks like they’re closed.” he glances in the direction of the café.
“Well damn. Hmm.” I think for a moment and suggest a few other places nearby. We decide on the Bluebird, a fabulous bar down the street from where we’re standing.
“You look nice.” he tells me as we start walking.
“So do you.” I don’t get to drink him in until we’re seated across from each other at a small wooden table, beer in our hands, still smiling at each other. His warm hazel eyes sparkle, reflecting interest, and attraction. I quite like it, finding myself giving it back. He’s wearing a black sweater that is contrasting his smooth fair skin but enhancing his short, black, straight hair and facial hair. His smile lights me up and I find myself wanting to run my fingers over his as he sets his beer down after taking a sip.
“I admire your writing.” he tells me. “Most people write a few lines and stare off into space for a while but you’re really consistent with it.”
“Thank you!” I laugh.
“I was trying to sneak a peek at it. You really pack a lot in there.”
I nod. That I do and even then it’s not everything which makes me crazy.
Our conversation lasts through beer, dinner and more beer. We both have to be up early tomorrow and both said before dinner that we couldn’t stay out late. We’ve been here for five hours. So much for an early bedtime.
“I’m having a really good time with you.” he smiles.
“Me too.” I like hearing this. I don’t think to say it nearly enough when enjoying someone’s company.
“I’ve got to get going though.” he tells me.
“I know, me too.”
We both stand, putting all our winter gear on and minutes later we’re back out in the freezing air.
As we approach the huge Damen, Milwaukee, North Ave intersection he turns and gives me huge hug.
“You give a good hug!” he smiles.
“So do you!”
We both agree we had a great time and he asks if he can call me again.
“Of course!”
After saying goodnight, he turns to get on the train and I walk home, smiling to myself, trying to hurry to stay warm...